5 heart lessons PLUS a super-specific gratitude practice

1. Stay open, even when things get scary, when things hurt, or when your heart is breaking.

2. Reconnecting with your tenderness and innocence creates space to have compassion for yourself & others.

3. Balance taking care of yourself with serving others. Self-care is a selfless act and you cannot pour into others when your own well is dry.

4. You are your own source of love. Stop seeking the “kind of love you need” from others. It’s time that you realize every tiny ounce of love that you can feel and receive is generated from WITHIN you.

5. Grief is simply love that has nowhere to go. When you’re feeling loss, grief or sadness, take a moment for real gratitude.

I don’t mean rattling off a list of things you think you should be grateful for.

I mean pausing, finding stillness, and feeling a powerful sense of love and a humble sense of awe and wonder, as you visualize or see something very specific* that you are grateful exists or that it happened.

Let it wash over you and warm you from within.

*Example of specific gratitude that summons a feeling and energetic charge:

Instead of “I am grateful for my dogs”, summon something more specific and emotionally resonant that creates a visual (if you are not currently seeing it in front of you)…

“I am grateful for the joyful feeling that washes over me when I remember bending over my dog Zoey in the kitchen for a squeeze. The sun was shining on my pinkish hair, her white fur looked so bright, almost translucent against my blue shirt. I remember the little sigh she made and how soft her velvet muzzle was.”

Now that is a memory that reconnects me fully to a past-present moment.

It makes my heart feel full and brings tears to my eyes that this moment existed and that I had the chance to experience it.

5 senses mindfulness activity

Little pleasures.

Like being able to SMELL flowers.

Our senses help us process so much information, and we tend to take them for granted.

Take a few minutes from your day and practice this mindfulness activity:

Notice 5 things you can see.
Notice 4 things you can feel.
Notice 3 things you can hear.
Notice 2 things you can smell.
Notice 1 thing you can taste.

Shift your perspective

I am constantly playing with my perspective.

Circumstances and situations and external factors don’t need to change before I can feel full of love, joy, gratitude and fulfillment.

The only thing I can change, and the thing that has the power to help me reshape my reality and the world is my perspective.

Sitting in how I felt today — uninspired, unmotivated, annoyed, frustrated, anxious — my perspective was so narrow, closed and limited.

I needed a shift.

And then I received a helpful reframe from @wolf_daughter_

Sometimes, when we feel like we “should” or “need” to do something it’s a signal to chill for a beat.

There is no need to fix or force our way through, even when we feel like a shift would be helpful.

So, instead of pushing forward and efforting my way through, I shut my laptop, took a long, hot dog walk and ended up in my favorite summer spot.

I set myself up on a picnic blanket under our big maple tree for a bit of kundalini and breath work, surrounded by my sweet doggies.

I played some music, moved through, cried, laughed, shook, and got interrupted by dogs several times for kisses.

And it was the sweetest shift in perspective I’ve had in a long time.

Are you a victim in your healing process?

Victim Energy comes out when our ego and our shadows try to keep us where we are in life.

But when you’re constantly working on yourself and you’re trying to bring your shadows into the light you’re going to have to realize that your ego and your shadows are going to keep trying to make sure that you’re disconnected from yourself and your feelings and your emotions and from other people who can support you.

It will tell you lies like “no one else can understand what you’re going through” or “you’re in this alone” or “no one is strong enough to hold you in this space” or “what will other people think of you if you share what you’re going through?”

So, not only do you keep yourself isolated, but you start to blame other people for not being there for you.

But the problem is you’re the one creating that situation!

Where are you playing a victim in your own healing process?

Where is attachment holding you back?

For years, I hesitated to call myself an artist despite secretly aching to.

More recently, I observed my discomfort when advocating for a c-level title: Chief Brand & Product Officer.

And, frequently, it is easy to slip into the habit of identifying with things like:

“I’m a projector”
“I’m an enneagram 8”
“I’m an INFP”
“I am a gemini”
“I am the type of person who journals”
“I am a morning person”

What is this attachment to identity, labels and titles?

A sense of external validation.
A signpost that you have achieved something “important”.
A feeling of fitting into a group.

We overly attach and identify with these myths and perceptions so much that they become a core part of our stories and beliefs about ourselves and our reality.

What we REALLY desire.
What we REALLY need is...

To be recognized.
To arrive worthy of love.
To feel connection and belonging.

What do we need to fulfill our true, authentic needs?

(I’ll distill it down as much as possible!)

1. Notice that you are NOT your programming, your patterns, your stories, or the voice inside your head.

2. Surface your shadows, accept them, embrace them, and transmute them into gifts. (Hint: attachment to labels and identities is a great place to begin your journey)

3. Release your attachment and merge into a more resonant, authentic, whole version of yourself.

It’s a process of catch and release.

What label, title, identity or achievement are you attached to at the moment?

Where is this attachment holding you back or having you play small in your life?

What is possible for you if you release your attachment to this concept?